Category Archives for Introvert

How To Never Be Shy Again (For Introverts)

How To Never Be Shy Again (For Introverts)

Reading time: 6 minutes

Three years ago I was triggered.

Walking back to my car I was shocked at my reaction in class.

It was in one of those big auditorium classes with 300+ people. The professor was giving a brief description of the difference between extroverts and introverts.

“Extroverts are louder, more social and introverts are shy”.

A noise escaped my throat, which sounded like a combination of a “no!” and a gulp. Looking at the student next to me writing notes: “introvert = shy”.

I was furious. Triggered completely.

Being a very proud introvert this did not go over smoothly.

The Current Narrative

I coach a lot of high-performing introverted men and to this day I’m shocked at the picture of success they have accepted to be true.

Most introverts unconsciously have this idea of what it takes to become ‘successful’.

Success? Well, you must be the life of the party. Loud. Talking to everyone.

So, wanting to be this ideal version of ‘success’, the introvert tries to model this behavior.

The truth of the matter: no matter how great I am at writing with my left hand, I’m still a righty at heart.

Some introverts are shy, some extroverts are shy. Men are shy. Women are shy.

If you consider yourself to be shy, this article will eradicate it for the rest of your life.

7. Become an expert communicator

If you were an expert in swimming and you saw a pool, there would be no fear about diving in. Same with social skills.

You must work consistently on having the best social skills in this entire universe. The more confidence you have in your ability to talk to people the less shy you will feel.

8. New beliefs

Mindset is everything.

If you think you are likeable then people will like you.

If you see people as being friendly and welcoming, that will be your reality.

The way to install this into your brain is simple.

Every time you talk to someone new and it goes well, take 30 seconds to re-affirm the belief (just like I did with the free hugs sign).

Beliefs need proof. Every time someone was nice to you is just further proof for your case. People ARE awesome. People ARE friendly, mind, didn’t you see what just happened? People are so friendly.

9. You are value and you are growing in value

You are value now because you are a human being.

That by itself is enough. You are enough. There is nothing you have to do in order to be more enough.

You are 10000000% enough in this exact moment.

You understand this and consistently build your own value at the same time. You workout, develop social skills, and focus on contributing and making an impact.

10. Focus outward

Shy people constantly focus all their attention on themselves. It’s very selfish and it propels you further and further down the hole of self-consciousness.

Keep all your attention on the person in front of you. Focus intently on their facial expressions and features. Focus on the appreciation you have for this person in front of you.

You choose what you focus on. Choose to focus on something outside of yourself and you will quickly fizzle all shyness from your system.

11. Mental movies and rehearsals

Take time to visualize you interacting with other people. How your ideal self would communicate with others. Visualize people enjoying your company, liking you as a person and being friendly.

This is your mental movie, keep this image fresh in your mind everyday.

The next step is to practice (rehearse) the events. Find a quiet place in your room or with friends and act like that person you visualized.

It might sound weird but talk to the mirror as if you were your ideal self. That charismatic, confident person that’s already inside of you.

12. Join The Bold Wolves Project

This program is the indoctrination to our community for introverted men.

Wolves is our introvert archetype.

Boldness is how we choose to live our life.

It’s crucial to find an empowering community of people that are creators at the highest level. It’s a lot harder to be shy when you are around fully self-expressive people.

Thank you for reading.

Daniel


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Be silent. Your actions speak loud enough.

Be Silent. Your Actions Speak Loud Enough

Reading time: 2 minutes

Stop talking. Stop wishing. Stop Dreaming. Stop looking for the next hack, the next secret tip.

If someone where to check your bank account for the last three months without knowing anything about you, what would they think about you?

If someone were to follow you around the entire day, how would they describe you as a person?

Is there a discrepancy between what you say and what you do?

You say you are interested in working out and losing weight?

But…your actions say otherwise.

You say you are interested in becoming wealthy beyond your wildest imaginations!

But…you haven’t put away any savings nor invested any money.

You say you are interested in changing your personality, becoming social and charismatic?

But…you don’t talk to strangers, you don’t socialize, you don’t connect.

Climb a mountain and don’t tell a soul.

It’s time to wake up from this illusion that most of us live in.

Create a 30-day challenge for any area of your life that you want to improve. Don’t tell a single person of what you are doing. Prove it to yourself that you are committed. Prove it to the universe that you are willing to put in the work.

Commit to waking up at 5:00am every day.

Commit to not eating junk food for a month.

Commit to saying hello to three strangers every day.

Commit to putting 10% of your income in your savings.

Commit to taking cold showers every single day.

Commit to doing 20 pushups/squats every single day.

Commit to meditating every day.

Don’t tell anyone of this challenge. It’s between you and you.

Your mind will do what you tell it to do.

If you want to break a sweat every day for 30 days, then tell your mind that.

Literally tell yourself:

“I want to break a sweat everyday for the next 30 days” “I choose to break a sweat everyday for the next 30 days, I choose to feel excited and happy every workout I do”. “I love working out, I love improving myself, I love taking action when I go after my goals”.

Your mind wants you to succeed, and make life easier for you.

Boost your self talk, make your new commitment enjoyable, tell yourself that you love it, that it excites you, that it makes you happy, that it fills you with joy.

Then stop talking and do it.

Your actions will show if you really want change, or if you just say you do.

And remember, be silent. Your actions will speak loud enough.


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I feel blessed for this opportunity to express myself on this platform through writing, videos and other forms of creative expression. If my words have impacted you in some way and you're curious to learn more subscribe to my weekly email newsletter.

No gimmicks, no scam. I am committed to creating world class content and possibly aiding you on your journey. My readers include both men and women, introvert and extrovert, CEOs and entrepreneurs, students, coaches, masters, rookies and quality human beings in general. They all signed up to be inspired, held accountable and grow together. 

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Are You Doing Personal Development Wrong?

Are You Doing Personal Development Wrong?

Reading time: 5 minutes

Her: “Just found a shortcut, take exit 11.”

Me: (Nods Head)

Her: “Literally just saved us 20 minutes! We will make it on time for sure.”

Me: (nods head)

Her: “Imagine if we came late… that would have sucked.”

Me: (nods head a tad faster in agreement)

Her: “Well, thanks for the input..”

Me: (quick sideways glance, smile and back to eyeing the road)

*2-minute silence*

Her: “You are such an asshole!”

Me: “What did I do?!”

Her: “You ignore everything I say and don’t pay attention! It’s like I’m having a conversation with myself.”

Little did she know at the time (before explaining myself), but I felt completely involved in the conversation.

— — — — — — — — —

As an introvert, you probably can relate to having this type of situation every once in awhile.

As an extrovert, you’re probably reading that conversation and can remember past conversations that were very similar.

Whether you are more extroverted or introverted (I call bullshit on ambiverts) is extremely important to know.

Knowing your Myers-Briggs personality type as my friend so eloquently said…

“…is as important as knowing if you’re a man or a woman.”

You might read that sentence and call bullshit.

I know I once did.

I took some 10-minute quiz, answered some questions and read some cool information that seemed like me.

At the time I valued this information as much as I value horoscopes (very little).

Two years later I met with an expert in Myers-Briggs and he explained all the cognitive functions in depth.

You know how some words you just ‘know’ the meaning of and have heard it hundreds of times but can’t really explain it?

Well, cognitive was one of those for me.

So check out the definition of cognitive functions that I looked up 3 minutes after that initial meeting with the expert.

“Cognitive functions can be defined as cerebral activities that lead to knowledge, including all means and mechanisms of acquiring information.”

In short, it’s how we process information and make decisions.

It’s the blueprint and key to understanding ourselves and others.

It’s how you see the world.

Your 4 letter personality type explains how your brain is wired, which functions you are weakest and strongest in.

A quick breakdown of the eight possible cognitive functions…

Extrovert (E) or Introvert (I)

Sensing (S) or Intuitive (N)

Thinkers (T) or Feelers (F)

Perceivers (P) or Judgers (J)

Sixteen possible combinations and you are definitely one of them.

You can take a test such as 16personalities.com or the genius style quiz on personalityhacker.com.

TWO WARNINGS:

Be as honest as possible in your answers, there is no correct answer. Just like in medicine, the correct diagnosis is almost the most important part of the doctor’s job.

Whatever four letter combination shows up does not necessarily mean that’s your type.

For example, I took the test and it showed I was an ENFP (the description matched me as well). Later on after talking with the expert I mentioned earlier we found out I was actually an INFJ.

Why could the answer be different?

...because it’s an online quiz for one, and some types are very similar to each other. When I was finally typed correctly as an INFJ I just knew it was me. All the functions made sense for the way I viewed the world.

Why Does This Matter?

Finding out your correct four letters is like finally understanding how your car works (engine, wheels, steering, brakes, etc) AND having the key to getting it started and moving.

Finding out your correct four letters will aid you in finding your ‘purpose’ or ‘passion’ and explain why you excel in certain areas and suck in others.

Finding out your correct four letters will tell you your strengths and weaknesses so you develop increased self-awareness as you continue in this journey of life. 

Finding out your correct four letters will help you with dating and understanding what type of woman/man you actually desire to be around.

There are numerous other benefits that we won’t get into today.

Right now…

Let’s get back to the reason you clicked this article in the first place…

I forget what the exact quote was but to paraphrase marketing wizard Dan Kennedy he said something like ‘if you are not planning your personal development you ain’t shit.’

Or, at least that’s how I heard it.

It never really sunk in.

It got stuck in that part of the brain where you ‘know stuff’.

Yeah, that part.

The part where you say stuff like “ohh I know that” and “I know this already”.

The part of the brain where action separates from knowledge.

You know that working out is good for you.

You know this…

But you decide to take your talents to the couch instead.

Finally, after I realized that I was falling prey to the information overload bias I decided to take a step back, bird’s eye view my progress and plan my development.

For the last year, it worked very well.

I improved. I slowly started to become the ‘best version of myself’ (is anyone else slowly starting to hate that phrase?).

It wasn’t enough.

I lacked the most important part of any type of self-help, self-development.

The foundation for any type of growth in ANY field.

Self-awareness.

I had some of it…

I meditated daily, qi gong, some yoga here and there, read a ton, hired coaches and mentors. 

I was pretty ‘aware’ until I found out the truth.

I didn’t truly know myself and how I work.

Myers-Briggs changed the game for me.

First, I figured out my real weaknesses, my strengths and how exactly I process information around me.

Second, I started understanding everyone’s personality types that I hung out with. It allowed me to become a better friend, to empathize and be supportive. It allowed me to use my strengths of connection and understanding in unique ways to different people.

Thirdly (is that a word?), I was able to develop my own values for my life, relationships, and success. This process (took weeks) has redefined my life and my level of happiness. My values now represent who I actually am, and they are in my own language, not anybody else's.

A completely different ball game.

While I am many, many hours away from even being considered an amateur expert in MBTI — I appreciated how much it helped me.

Some key takeaways you can have from this article…

  1. Find out your personality type. Take multiple tests, be honest and consult an expert to be typed officially.
  2. Find out who else was that personality type. Study and model the most developed people with your cognitive functions. When I study movie characters, tv show actors and famous people with my personal type it’s like they are a developed version of myself. The way they talk, see the world is very similar to me. 
  3. Go in depth on your type, learn your strengths, weaknesses, belief system, communication style etc.
  4. Don’t let any of your functions hold you down. The most introverted person in the world can be extremely social. Don’t let any of these functions become your ‘excuse’ to how you deal with the world.
  5. Define your values based on past experiences and your type. Build your character this way as well.
  6. Type all your close friends and understand the language they speak, then speak it to them.
  7. Plan your personal development based on your interests and personality type development.

If you are an introvert, stop being a fucking extrovert to fit in. It’s ok to have and develop an inner life. It’s ok to nod your head as an answer.

You might think this is some woo-woo bullshit.

Myers and Briggs are stupid and yada yada yada…

It’s cool, I understand.

I thought like that for quite some time.

Maybe this is not the self-awareness tool for you.

Maybe it is. 

It definitely has been an integral part of my development.

I wrote this article to demonstrate how learning my type has helped my personal development, my values, my goals and every part of my life.


Join the wolf pack

I feel blessed for this opportunity to express myself on this platform through writing, videos and other forms of creative expression. If my words have impacted you in some way and you're curious to learn more subscribe to my weekly email newsletter.

No gimmicks, no scam. I am committed to creating world class content and possibly aiding you on your journey. My readers include both men and women, introvert and extrovert, CEOs and entrepreneurs, students, coaches, masters, rookies and quality human beings in general. They all signed up to be inspired, held accountable and grow together. 

Ready to join us? Just enter your name and email and sign up for my free newsletter below. Yes, I want to know your name because I actually like knowing who is on my list. 

My email address is...

Zero spam. Unsubscribe at any time.